I Will

I will respond to Travel Guy to tell him I'm not feeling it. I haven't done it yet. I'm overthinking what I should say.  And I'm still hoping he'll ghost me, meaning he'll just disappear without a trace.

Inappropriate

Travel Guy asked me out for dinner.  It was much too late, I'm busy. Also, there's been a few sexual innuendos in our past two dates. It is very likely that I won't be seeing him again. We don't know each other very well at all, so, inappropriate.  And I've decided I don't want to get to know him better. I'm hoping he'll just stop asking me out. I think it's obnoxious if I accept a dinner date just to break up with him.

Let It Go

I don't know much about Buddhism, but I do know one of their beliefs is just to let it go.  That driver who cut you off?  Let it go.  That partner who cheated on you?  Let it go.  That promotion you should've gotten?  Let it go.

Things that bother me randomly pop into my head.  I'd like to say I'm able to just let it go, but that doesn't always happen.  In fact, sometimes it takes a tremendous amount of effort to let some of these things go.  It's usually relationship and dating type topics that takes me a lot of effort to let go.  I know one is suppose to be grateful and happy and that aids the process...  Perhaps, I'm going to get a book on Buddhism.

Divorce Can Be Even Better

Breakups can be great and divorce can be even better.  Many people seem to be afraid of divorce.  Sure, there are emotions and money involved.  However, once those are taken care of, each party has the rest of their lives to be happier alone or with someone else.  I have friends who've met with countless divorce attorneys and won't file for 10+ years because of alimony, child support, et al.  Well, alimony won't go away.  And one would lose more in terms of time than money if one values 10 years (or any amount of time) of his/her life?  Is another 10 years of misery not worth $____?  And if one worries about what his/her friends and family will think, is his/her happiness not more important than what others will think?

I had lunch with a guy friend of mine this week.  He's been married for decades.  He is hesitating on filing because he doesn't want his wife to have the "divorced lady" stigma.  I don't think that stigma exists anymore.  He's been unhappy for decades and sees himself doing this great thing for her by cheating (Tinder is his favorite app) because what she doesn't know won't hurt her.  Well, I think she's known for decades and it's not fair that he's taking away her real chance of happiness with someone else (or alone).

I had dinner with a guy friend of mine last week.  He got divorced.  Even though he is paying many thousands in alimony a month, he says it's worth every penny.  He said the process was terrible, but at the end, he's much happier now than he was when he was married.  He's been divorced for about nine years now.

Breakups Can Be Great

Many dread breakups, but they can be great.  Why waste time with someone who you don't really want to be with or who doesn't really want to be with you?  I had dinner with a good girlfriend of mine.  She has not broken up with her boyfriend again, but she seems to be miserable with him.  They've broken up several times in the past.  She's almost always in tears because they are almost always fighting.  I'm sure they have good days, but there seems to be many more bad days.  Her self esteem is in the toilet since he's tells her she's stupid and can't do better.  I don't see how that's a good use of her time on this planet.

She has this "I love him" or "he loves me" reasoning.  Well, if he loves her that much, would he say such hateful things?  Wouldn't he want her to be happy even if it meant not being with her?  Wouldn't she want someone who thought the world of her, instead of constantly putting her down?

Sometimes two people just aren't meant to be together.  They should appreciate the good times they managed to scrape together and realize the good times no longer exist.  Two good days out of 365 days is not a good ratio or relationship.