Happy New Year (Again)

Happy new year (again)!  It's Chinese New Year, so time to revise or make new resolutions...

No Sad Looks

I don't want sad looks when people find out I'm single.  This used to happen a lot at work.  Some people (I know they weren't trying to be mean) have even said, "Why are you single?  You are attractive and you don't seem psycho."  Is being single really that bad?  I don't think so!  I can think of a lot of things I have which the coupled up people do not, such as:

• I can sing really loudly and really poorly (not only in the shower)
• I can sleep for eight solid hours should I choose to (for the people with kids)
• I can eat ice cream for breakfast, lunch, and dinner and not get disapproving looks
• I don't have to wear clothes in my apartment if I don't want to
• I can spend 8K on shoes and not have to explain myself
• Basically, I can do whatever I want, when I want (I'm not talking about killing people, stealing cars, breaking into homes, etc, but you know this)

I'm tired of having to explain my status and way of life to people.  I stopped talking to an old friend because he kept telling me that he thinks I am a lesbian.  It got unbelievably annoying.  I have no problem with lesbians, but I don't need people in my life to insist that I am a lesbian because I don't have a man.

Societal Pressure

As much as I've been meeting new guys, dating, and talking about finding the right guy, I've realized that I don't think I actually want to find him right now (or maybe ever).  I love hanging out with myself, doing stuff by myself, and having the time to figure out who I am and who I want to be.  I can do whatever I want, whenever I want.

Unfortunately, I feel extremely pressured to find a guy and spend the next 50 years (which is a really long time) with him because I am in my 30s.  I blame society for this belief that women have an "expiration date."  Yes, it is true that some women may have difficulty conceiving should they want children if they are in their 40s, but not everyone wants children.  I've never known so many married people without children before moving to San Francisco.  Also, men believe they can be dads whenever they want whether they are 18 or 88; sure, that's true to a certain degree, but not without risks.  I saw this article years ago, so guys, if you are sitting on your high horses, time to dismount.

I do still believe that if/when I'm ready to meet the right guy I will.  Some may say I am being foolish, I disagree.

I'll Pay Someone To Do It For Me

A married girl was very confused as to how I was going to buy and move a chair off of Craigslist.  She had been with her guy for such a long time that she didn't know how to move furniture without him.  She wasn't even joking when she said, "See, this is why you need a boyfriend, so he can move stuff for you." She was genuinely surprised when I told her, "I'll pay someone to do it for me."

Gals, please don't feel helpless.  You can always ask friends/family or pay people to do stuff for you.  I'd rather pay people than trouble my friends.  Yeah, I'm sure friends would be happy to help, but why inconvenience them especially when manual labor is involved?

I Had To Open It

A 62 year old guy emailed me on match.com.  I just had to open it because I was embarrassed for him.  Yeah yeah, age is just a number, but is it really?  What would I have in common with a guy that's around my dad's age?  AND, he's only looking to date a "sensual woman" in the 28-42 age bracket.  What a douche.

Oh yeah, also got a wink from a 76 year old guy looking for a gal that's 29-39.  Jeez.

Nada On Match.com

This article was pretty cute.  It's written by a 50 something year old lady.  She talks about her experience on match.com.

I've gotten 80+ emails and have not wanted to go out with any of these guys, so...

Checking Out The Ladies

I was checking out the ladies on OkC today...specifically ladies that are similar to me (age range, zip code, educational background, etc).  There are a lot of pretty ladies! Guys shouldn't be complaining about the lack of attractive women in SF.

This is not directed at anyone specific, so please take no offense, this is just a reality check.  For the guys who talk about how all the girls in SF are stuck up, unresponsive, not engaging, boring, etc, maybe it's you.  Let's say these ladies are 7s and 8s while you (the guy being blown off/not getting responses) are a 4 or a 5, why would she respond to you?  Or, read this post I wrote last year about ladies not responding to your emails.