Friday, October 30, 2009


I've gone into hiding...sort of.  And of course, the more I do not want to be found, the more people want to find me.

Arthur doesn't get it.  He has been calling me all week and does NOT get it.  If I don't pick up or return calls, that probably means something.  Okay the first couple of times, it doesn't mean anything, but if it happens for 3-4 weeks straight, it means something.  Does he think I am "playing hard to get?"  In his case, I will never be "gotten."  And you know what?  The more he calls me, the more I dislike him.  In the beginning, I wanted to be friends with this guy because he is funny, nice, and intelligent.  Now?  I don't think so.  He has gone from having good attributes to being annoying.  I don't think he understands that being friends with me does not mean I want to hear from him ALL the time and see him every weekend.  I think he got the word "friend" confused with "boyfriend."

Why is it that I always find the guys with stalker tendencies?  Or is it, they find me?  Why can't guys just be happy being friends with me?  What part of "not interested" is confusing???

I feel like a part of me dies when I have to explain myself to people I don't want to explain myself to.  Why should I?  Is the person asking to hear every detail of my life my mother?  For example, conversation with Arthur:
A: What are you doing this weekend?
AG: I have plans.
A: Oh, big date?
AG: (at this point I know the conversation will not end until I tell him what I am doing this, I could say big date and get even more questions or just tell the truth - or something close to the truth).  Going to dinner with the girls on Friday and up to Napa on Saturday (I can feel a part of me dying)

Not only is a part of my dying, but I am becoming more hostile.  I can feel it.  It makes sense, "fight or flight."  Since "flight" didn't work, my mind is saying "fight." Even if I am lying, I become more hostile.  It's the act of having to share this information that I find insufferable. 

Odie's Back?
I had an Odie encounter this week.  Oh yes, you remember Odie?  It seems like he is still interested...maybe not much, but it is still there.  Sh*t or get off the pot...or not, I don't think I care.  He waited too long.  It went from me being interested to annoyed to very apathetic.  There is no hate here, just apathy.  There would have to be an enormous grand gesture from him to get me slightly interested.

I heard from Dewey this week.  Or maybe it was last week?  Whatever, obviously nothing worth remembering.

Advice for the guys:
Yes, girls typically like aggressive guys who pursue them.  However, sometimes she just isn't interested.  Ouch your ego hurts...get over it.  As I was saying, there is a difference.  I think you can figure it out...  Pursue a girl too hard who has actually said, "We are friends, nothing more" and you won't even get to be friends with her unless she likes to be irritated.  Sure, you could wait for her to change her mind which could happen, but your transparent attempts are not going to help your cause.  If she changes her mind, she will let you know.

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