Breakup Season

Has breakup season moved? It used to be right before or right after the holidays. Many of my girlfriends have broken up with their boyfriends (or were broken up with by their boyfriends) in August and September.  Many celebrity divorces in the news too.

I've always seen September as a time to restart.  This association probably stems from all the years of getting ready for the new school year.

According to many divorce attorneys, January is traditionally "divorce month" with a small spike in August.

Three Down

Had dinner with Travel Guy Saturday tonight.  We had a nice conversation.  He's growing on me, but I'm still not very into it.  It also doesn't help that I'm starting to think he's still married (even though he's told me he's divorced).

He wants to see me again this week.  I'm going to pay much closer attention to what he says/how he acts.  I don't want to ask him directly yet because that could make it seem like I don't trust him and/or I'm paranoid.

Three dates down last week.  I'm tired of dating.

Two Down

If a guy isn't specific about a date being a dinner date because we meet at a lounge, he gets one hour, maximum.  He was quite surprised when I ended the date.  Well, it's dinner time and one appetizer isn't sufficient.  I'm probably not going to see him again because he just got divorced and is boring.  He also looks nothing like his photos.

Two dates down this week, one more to go.

One Down

I cancelled a date tonight.  He didn't set plans for tonight.  No time and restaurant.  For a first date, spontaneity doesn't work.  One down, two more to go this week.  I might cancel the others too because I feel like I just want to be...with no obligations to be anywhere with anyone.

Napa

Over the weekend, I went on a day date to Napa with that guy I'm unsure about.  (I think I'll call him Travel Guy because he seems to take a lot of vacations.)  Unfortunately, I still don't think I find him attractive.  From past experience, I know attraction level can grow the more I see his positives.

The date - he picked me up, we had lunch in Napa, and went to a few wineries.  He insisted on buying me several bottles of wine.  Then he drove me home.

He texted the very next morning asking to see me again.  This guy means business.  This is what it looks like when someone is trying to date you.  I've never gotten a "Hey" text from him.  When he texts, it's to make plans, and I like that.

Ultra Fast Breakup Recovery

I think this will work for both men and women.  I highly recommend going on a date with someone new to get the ex out of your head.  Yes, it's hard, you're still sad, angry, et al, but I do believe it speeds up the breakup recovery process.  I don't know about you, but I certainly want an ultra fast breakup recovery.

Ultra Fast Breakup Recovery (1 and 2 are interchangeable steps):

1. Go on a date.  Just go.  You don't have to think s/he's "the one."  Go with an open mind and try to have a nice time.  It's just a date
2. Stop all communication with the ex.  Defriend the ex on facebook.  Unfollow the ex on instagram and twitter.  Ignore or block all of his/her calls/messages.  You get the idea.  Never ever reach out to the ex.  If the ex left a toothbrush at your house, throw it out, s/he can buy a new one.  If the ex left something of value at your house, mail it to him/her.  Do not see the ex.  The ex is a part of your past.  (If you want to get back together with him/her, move on with your life until s/he makes a compelling argument as to why you should give him/her the time of day.  Usually, that means fixing whatever problem that led you to wanting to break up.  You might not even want him/her back after you recover)

Mark As Spam

The Ex Guy just texted me again and it's making me angry.  On several different occasions, I've told him not to email, call, or text.  This hasn't deterred him.  My friends are telling me to block him.  Yes, it's easy to block a phone number.  No, it's not easy to block email (or maybe it is, I've never had to try).

I shouldn't need to block him.  He's a grown man.  We have broken up.  Our relationship is over.  He should know how to act when someone says, "Please don't speak to me."  Continuing to reach out is obnoxious.  What is he hoping to gain by reaching out?  Will I tell him I want to get back together?  "Thanks for being obnoxious and completely disregarding my requests, let's get back together."  No.  I know he wants to be on my mind and hopes that will prevent me from dating other men.  Tough, I am dating other men.

Perhaps his phone will be blocked and his email will receive the "mark as spam" treatment.