Friday, May 8, 2015

Ex Girlfriends

A female friend told me men think about ex girlfriends.  Not, "I really want her back," but more "I don't believe she did that to me," "I can't believe she didn't protest when I broke up with her," or "I can't believe she dumped me" kind of thoughts.  Is this true?

Do women do this?  I only think about my ex boyfriends when someone asks me about them.  And I usually think, "On to the next."

11 comments:

  1. If you're asking whether a very general blanket statement is true, then the answer is no. I know plenty of guys who pine over ex girlfriends. It completely depends on the nature of the relationship, who ended it, and the type of people both are. Maybe they do want them back, or maybe they're still upset over how it ended. It's not a male/female thing, it's entirely personal.

    I'm sensitive, emotional, and I get attached to people. While I strictly enforce no contact with ex's, I'm not immune to sad thoughts. It takes me a long time to get over relationships. And I know PLENTY of men that are the same way.

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    1. I think the people I know are less sensitive and/or better at "acting tough"

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    2. I tend to surround myself with people similar to me in E.Q. - that is, more sensitive and sympathetic. We help each other through break-ups and relationship turmoil. We discuss stuff to death, analyze texts, rehash things, and reminisce. I wouldn't want it any other way :)

      Even my few guy friends are more on the sensitive side. But they make amazing boyfriends to the women they date, and it's great hearing their perspective when girls don't text back, are too self-involved, etc.

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  2. Seriously AG, your blog is pissing me off. None of my comments save...

    I second what Sabrina said.

    Also, I'm still getting over my ex and it's been almost 9 months. I also know he thinks about me (confirmed last night), but I have a feeling it's in more of the "How could someone cut me out of my life like that? I'm a Libra and everyone MUST love me."

    I also think lack of closure can spawn comments/feelings of that nature.

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    1. My blog does usually piss people off ;) Sorry, I don't know why they aren't saving. When this happens, are you usually on a device, desktop, et all?

      This is a different guy from the one you mentioned a few weeks ago or the same guy?

      Oh yes, agree, lack of closure could definitely do that

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    2. Not sure - it's a desktop and the same one I usually use to comment. This is a new development!

      Hmm, not sure which guy I mentioned before. This is the one who couldn't be monogamous, broke my heart, etc. The most recent guy was nobody. Hehe.

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    3. So strange

      Was it the one that you met through bicycling? LOL, "most recent guy was a nobody," love it!

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  3. It's pretty obvious that you don't really have feelings. The so called people you that you know seem emotionless, aggressive, and cutthroat. Why not just move to NY and become a banker already? It's no wonder you're having such a hard time dating.... men want to date WOMEN, not cold and aggressive bitches.

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    1. You know how in Charlie Brown they have that wah wah wah wah when the teacher is talking? That's what I hear when you speak/comment

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  4. I agree with Sabrina and TJ, it depends on the person; it's not really a gender thing. Again, I'm overly sensitive, and I think back on past exes, to reflect on what went wrong and how I behaved, so I can correct past mistakes. E.g. Ex No. 1, I gave up friends to be with him, I let him control me, and he took me for granted and I let him treat me like a doormat, until he repeatedly cheated on me = Never again - in future, I leave. Ex no. 3 had no ambition and was boring; he didn't appreciate me, so goodbye.

    Likewise, with friends (as in Sabrina's case), I rehash things out. Discuss mistakes and approaches. The problem is, when you're dating someone who is so similar to you in temperament...

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    1. Sorry about the exes. Glad you were able to leave.

      I do reflect on what went wrong for a limited amount of time, but I've heard some people rehash for many years. I don't see that as the best use of time or good for one's emotions

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