Thursday, March 23, 2017

On A Break

I've been on a break from men and dating.  I still check my various apps and sites about once a week, but my heart's not in it.  I think there's a lot I want to see and do before I meet someone.

I was talking to a girlfriend, she one of those girls who is almost never single.  She's also on a break from men and dating.  She's putting all her energy into finishing school and working a lot to get a new car.  Another girlfriend of mine has been divorced for about a year, she's on a break from men too.  She's focusing on getting a group of us together every month for a girl's trip.  Let's go!

Sunday, March 5, 2017

The Who Didn't Matter

I haven't heard from that guy that I went out with a couple weeks ago and that's fine.  From the date, I got the sense that he was too fresh off his divorce, which was finalized not too long ago. 

Also, his followup texts rubbed me the wrong way.  Instead of suggesting we go out to dinner again, a movie, a hike, et al, he kept suggesting activities that would require a plane.  That seemed odd to me.  We just met and he was talking about trips to Europe and Asia with the closest destination being Mexico.  Sorta made me think he was just trying to get laid if he was skipping very ahead to overnight out of the country activities.  It also made me think he was just dying to get into another relationship and the who didn't matter.

Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Begging Mutual Friends

It's 2017 and I'm not supposed to be talking about the ex guy.  I will for a minute because I'd like to share what he's doing wrong.  He's been asking mutual friends to talk to me on his behalf.  That seems incredibly immature.  He knows what went wrong between us.  Instead of trying to fix the things that needed to be fixed (not that I think those things can be fixed), he's begging mutual friends to get involved.  When mutual friends bring up his name, I change the topic.

Like one of my resolutions for 2017, I'm not taking any guy seriously unless he gives me a reason to take him seriously.  And, with this guy, I do not take him seriously.  I am annoyed that he's trying to involve mutual friends.  I would just like for him to leave me alone.

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

More Of A Friend?

That Saturday night date was good.  We had a lot in common.  We had a lot to talk about.  He was sociable and aware of social cues.  Unfortunately, I don't know if there's a spark.  I think I see him as more of a friend?  If he asks me out again, I'll go.

He's been texting me, but hasn't asked me on another date.  I don't consider a date an actual date unless there is a time, place, and day.  He's been throwing out ideas of things for us to do.  I've agreed to the ideas, but there aren't proposed times or days, which makes me think he might not be that sincere or interested. 

Let's see if a second date actually gets scheduled.  If it does, fine.  If it doesn't, fine.

Saturday, February 11, 2017

Feeling Pretty Good

I have a date tonight and I'm actually feeling pretty good about it.  He hasn't sent me one pointless text!  That's so great!!  His texts were very direct and he asked me out in his second text.  The rest of the texts were date logistics like time, place, day.  I like it when guys are to the point.  None of this "How was your weekend," "Hi," "What was your last vacation," et al texts.

Wednesday, February 8, 2017

No Longer Much Of A Crush

My new crush is no longer much of a crush.  We've been texting a little here and there.  I'd say he's not interested enough, I'm not interested enough, or both.  If either of us were that interested, we'd be finding a way to be in the same zip code, not exchanging pointless texts.  There's no point in saying "Hi" from time to time.  Even though we met in person and not online, I really hate "Hi" texts

He's getting the irrelevant treatment (part of my dating and relationship resolutions).  I have NO plans of replying to his next text (if he even sends one) unless it's a "Hey, I'm going to be in town, let's have dinner" type of message.

Friday, February 3, 2017

Five Dating And Relationship Resolutions

Currently, I have five dating and relationship resolutions.  I might add more later.  These are the ones that are most important for me right now.

  1. Be more present.  I can't change the past and I can't predict the future.  Why waste time and energy thinking about either one?
  2. Accept things as they are, not how I think they should be or how I'd like them to be
  3. Stop giving guys the benefit of the doubt and cancel when I have a sneaking suspicion the date will be terrible.  I can't remember a time where I wanted to cancel, went, and it turned out to be great.  (If you read Blink by Malcolm Gladwell, he basically says you become an expert at something once you do it for over 10,000 hours.  I know I've had more than 10,000 hours of going on dates, analyzing texts, emails, and conversations, and talking about men, dating, and relationships.)
  4. Treat a guy with the utmost level of irrelevancy until he gives me reasons to make him relevant in my life.  I will not spend more than one minute talking about guys with my friends before or after a date.  I will not play the "what if" game.  I will not let guys who don't get the hint annoy me.  Et al.
  5. Not take things on my calendar so seriously.  For example, one of my girlfriends keeps asking me to lunch and rescheduling.  Going forward, I'll leave it penciled in on my calendar, but if that day and time rolls around and I'd rather do something else, I'm canceling and doing that something else