I had a drink with a guy friends last night. He's in his late 20s/early 30s and was talking about how he is absolutely totally in love with the girl he is currently dating. They've been dating for a month, he plans on asking her to be exclusive in the next few weeks because he doesn't want to lose her to another guy. And, sex is the last thing on his mind (he has not tried to move it into the bedroom).
This is what it looks like when a guy is really into a girl, none of this "sorta with" rubbish.
We all hear stories about guys who strung along a girl for ages in a weird limbo until she finally got fed up with his immaturity and commitment issues. After the break up, he meets another woman who is madly in love with and not afraid to declare it to the world, because she's the right woman. I think two big factors play into whether a relationship succeeds. First, timing: both of you in the same phase/wanting the same thing at the same time. Second, the person: when the right person comes, you'll want to take the leap.
ReplyDeleteYes!! I've heard a million of those stories too, the guy who dated his ex for five years, they break up, then he gets engaged in five months.
DeleteThe right person is a big factor, as well as, timing, but my main point is if a guy is serious and thinks the girl is a very real prospect, she will know because of his actions or lack of actions (including pushing her into the bedroom without trying to get to know her, not wanting to make her his girlfriend, et al). He isn't "sorta with" her, he wants to make her his.