Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Dating In SF Is Hard

Dating in SF is hard.  I've heard this from men and women over the past six years.  It's been a long time since I've dated in another city (besides a couple of weeks in NY over the summer), can't really compare.  Maybe dating has gotten hard everywhere?

I'm back to not dating for a while.  I hear about these tech guys who are done with dating, which is why they throw themselves into work, startups, marathons, etc.  I totally get why they do it.  One of my girlfriends decided to throw herself into her new job so she can get promoted, make a ton of money, and not worry about finding a husband (she is in her late 30s).  It doesn't sound like a bad idea.

14 comments:

  1. I hear ya sister. I'm in my mid 30s and throwing in the towel as well. At least I know that I tried...

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    1. Yup. Single professional woman as Sabrina put it.

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  2. I was warned about that before I moved to SF. And I hear the same thing about NY...rhe men are obsessed with money, power-hungry douchebags, etc. I wonder if dating is just hard when you're an educated professional 30-something woman living in a major urban center? At this point, we're picky because we know we can survive JUST FINE solo, so we're not going to settle for some loser. Thereby making the dating pool that much smaller.

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    1. Hi Sabrina! No one ever warned me before I moved to SF, not sure I would have listened back then, was pretty determined to leave NY. We totally know we can do just fine solo. I wonder what other educated 30 something women do or how they found their significant others

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    2. Looking at some of the couples I've met recently... one was introduced to each other by friends but the remaining 3 met online. 2 are married, the other 2 live together.

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    3. Do they seem happy? Unfortunately, from the guys I've met, I feel like I'd be settling

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    4. They all seem very happy. No one among them is the type of person that needs to settle. Remember that you are not going to be exposed to every available guy out there, by sheer logic.

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    5. Glad they are happy! Have I just encountered a disproportionate amount of "bad" guys

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  3. I am also so fed up with dating around here. My last BF insisted on having an open relationship - that didn't work or end well. Every guy I'm interested in doesn't feel the same way or doesn't have the same expectations (or plays too many games), and then those who are interested in me are just boring or not my type. And, like AG hinted at, I'm not going to settle. (Though, sometimes I have to really determine if I'm settling or just being picky and superficial.) I'm guessing it's like this in a lot of big cities, especially on the coasts. It's Peter Pan syndrome all over the place! And, with online dating so prevalent, men just think they have unlimited options.

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    1. Hi, TJ. I remember when you were newer to SF. Sorry, you have joined my world. I was hoping it'd be different for you because you live in a different part of town, are attracted to different kinds of guys, etc.

      Open relationship? It takes balls to say something like that, lol. Yeah, I don't think I'd be okay with that.

      I'm glad you aren't settling! Stay strong :) I don't think you are being too picky, I just don't think we have much to pick from/through

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  4. Ok I am so done with dating. I just got back from date #2 with a guy. He asked to go to a movie and was proactive and bought the tickets. I thought it was a bit strange because I just met him and a movie doesn't allow time to talk, but figured maybe we will hang out afterward. Nope. Just saw the movie and went home. Next.

    There is NOTHING out there.

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    1. Sorry, Anon. If he's a blond lawyer in his mid to late 30s living in the Peninsula, I've gone out with him before too! He only wanted to go to movies and sometimes it was his 4th viewing of the same movie!

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