Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Good Points

I was skimming a book at a friend's over the weekend. It was a relationship book. The parts I read said (that is the parts I remember):
  • Have realistic expectations
  • Be compassionate
  • Be real
  • Don't tell them they are wrong
  • Don't obnoxiously point out faults
  • Don't boast
  • Don't let issues fester

The Brain has definitely done all the "Dont's." 
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14 comments:

  1. jAugust 7, 2013 at 6:39 PM

    All great points!

    "Don't let issues fester" is the best IMO.

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  2. AshaAugust 7, 2013 at 10:16 PM

    Those sound more like points for new relationships rather than longer relationships. Sure it would be nice if we all followed those, but once you get comfortable with a person, it's so easy to slip into bad habits like those.

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    Replies
    1. Adventuresaurus GirlAugust 8, 2013 at 10:04 AM

      True, and I see that as a major issue. It's like, just because you are married or dating for a while, the courting/good behavior should not stop. Just because someone is impressed/invested for the time being, does not mean it will continue in perpetuity.

      Side note, I find it disturbing that some people think urinating with the door open is a sign of closeness

      Delete
    2. AshaAugust 12, 2013 at 4:11 PM

      I don't mind the urinating in front of me so much as I mind defecating. (YES, this has happened to me in a relationship, lol.) I wouldn't define it so much as a point of closesness as I would a sign of vulnerability. This person feels comfortable enough with you to allow you to see them during a vulnerable time. But, I can totally see why it's a turn off.

      Delete
    3. Adventuresaurus GirlAugust 12, 2013 at 9:26 PM

      Gross! Yeah, another form of vulnerability (not involving a bathroom) would be just fine

      Delete
  3. AnonymousAugust 8, 2013 at 6:11 AM

    Why are you STILL bringing up The Brain? You seem completely unwilling to date him, yet you can't stop mentioning him. So he can't be insignificant to you. If you don't want him, stop giving him power.

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    Replies
    1. Adventuresaurus GirlAugust 8, 2013 at 9:59 AM

      Because he is unavoidable. He asks friends about me, which of course I hear about. He contacts me every couple of weeks/months for dinner, drinks, lunch, etc. He likes just about everything I do on FB (and no, I can't defriend him, I've tried this and mutual friends were up in arms).

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    2. AshaAugust 12, 2013 at 4:13 PM

      You CAN unfriend him. You live life for you, not your friends. Who cares what they say. You have to live with your choices, not them. If it's something you feel that you need to do, don't let anyone's stance on the situation stand in your way. You seem much too independent for your mutual friends to be an excuse to keep him as a friend.

      Delete
    3. Adventuresaurus GirlAugust 12, 2013 at 9:29 PM

      I see what you are saying, Asha. Unfortunately, unfriending him will ruin my peace and quiet; I don't want mutual friends calling, emailing, and texting me about it nonstop...especially since he would whine to them about it.

      Delete
    4. AnonymousAugust 15, 2013 at 4:38 PM

      It sounds like your friends have no life if something like that causes drama! Especially if he's bothering you. As Asha said, you live for yourself, not your friends. Guys like that don't deserve your attention.

      Delete
    5. Adventuresaurus GirlAugust 15, 2013 at 9:28 PM

      True, he does not deserve my attention!!!

      Delete
  4. urban_dreamerAugust 18, 2013 at 8:41 PM

    The book contradicts itself. How is that supposed to work? Don't tell them they are wrong & Don't tell them they are wrong VS. Don't let issues fester? I can't do it either :)

    ReplyDelete

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