A single girl in San Francisco (SF) + meeting guys + dating + relationships + poor decisions + having fun = Blog with Adventures + (commentary + random thoughts + advice).
Friday, January 29, 2016
Regressing
I'm regressing. When I was a kid, I used to cry all the time. I'm turning back into my five year old self. I don't remember why I used to cry, I just know that I did. As I get older, I find myself crying out of anger...a lot.
have you considered therapy? in many of your posts you express how angry you feel; oftentimes, the thing you describe as making you angry doesn't seem like it should be that upsetting.
cognitive behavioral therapy changed my life! it made me way less angry and let me take greater charge of my emotions. i agree with anonymous above, you should consider it.
I'm the first Anonymous...I think your framing of the problem is why you need therapy. Maybe you are surrounded by an unusually high number of awful people, but my guess is that's not the case. Not talking to people who make you angry isn't a solution when almost everyone makes you angry. CBT is about trying to understand the root causes for your anger and shifting your beliefs/the way you react to situations and people.
I think I see what others don't. Perhaps I should have my eyes glued to my cell phone so I don't see what I see? Examples of things that I think are rude and very much make my angry: not letting the elderly person have a seat on muni, having someone walk right into me because he/she is texting, seeing when people don't hold the door for someone behind them, et al
Second Anonymous - I echo the first one. Therapy didn't help me avoid people that are infuriating. The world is full of them and some you just cannot avoid.
Therapy helped me realize that no one is responsible for my feelings but me. I also learned how to change my reaction to things that made me angry or upset, and to identify triggers faster. This took a year or so, therapy and CBT techniques do not work overnight.
Also your comment about "Perhaps I should have my eyes glued to my cell phone so I don't see what I see" makes you come off as an egotistical bitch, not a normal flawed person. Lots of people are upset by the injustices in this world, even small. But just because they don't cry or blog about it does not make them inferior to you.
Haven't had time to read all the comments, to the 3rd Anon, I was being serious about ignoring the world around me and you seem to have issues if you are so defensive
ah, your usual response that your commenters must have issues if they're providing you with feedback.
Of course I see people on the train not give up their seats to an obviously pregnant woman, I get walked into while someone else is texting, etc. these things might annoy me for a moment, but they don't make me hate the world or cause me to cry out of anger. Sometimes someone doesn't hold the door because they're preoccupied with something that is happening in their life and they didn't notice. It happens. Sometimes I've been the person to walk into someone while texting because I'm frazzled and running terribly late and trying to reach my friend while walking. It doesn't make me a terrible person, in the same way that these people you are so angry at are also probably not terrible people.
Lots happening here. I agree with the comment about CBT. It's helped me considerably deal with anxiety and stopping anxious thoughts before they spiral out of control. The world is full of people and things that will make you angry, whether they do it on purpose or inadvertently. But dealing with those emotions is your own responsibility.
have you considered therapy? in many of your posts you express how angry you feel; oftentimes, the thing you describe as making you angry doesn't seem like it should be that upsetting.
ReplyDeleteI just need to stop talking to people who make me angry?
Deletecognitive behavioral therapy changed my life! it made me way less angry and let me take greater charge of my emotions. i agree with anonymous above, you should consider it.
ReplyDeleteDid you start distancing yourself from situations and people who made you angry?
DeleteI'm the first Anonymous...I think your framing of the problem is why you need therapy. Maybe you are surrounded by an unusually high number of awful people, but my guess is that's not the case. Not talking to people who make you angry isn't a solution when almost everyone makes you angry. CBT is about trying to understand the root causes for your anger and shifting your beliefs/the way you react to situations and people.
DeleteI think I see what others don't. Perhaps I should have my eyes glued to my cell phone so I don't see what I see? Examples of things that I think are rude and very much make my angry: not letting the elderly person have a seat on muni, having someone walk right into me because he/she is texting, seeing when people don't hold the door for someone behind them, et al
DeleteSecond Anonymous - I echo the first one. Therapy didn't help me avoid people that are infuriating. The world is full of them and some you just cannot avoid.
DeleteTherapy helped me realize that no one is responsible for my feelings but me. I also learned how to change my reaction to things that made me angry or upset, and to identify triggers faster. This took a year or so, therapy and CBT techniques do not work overnight.
Also your comment about "Perhaps I should have my eyes glued to my cell phone so I don't see what I see" makes you come off as an egotistical bitch, not a normal flawed person. Lots of people are upset by the injustices in this world, even small. But just because they don't cry or blog about it does not make them inferior to you.
DeleteHaven't had time to read all the comments, to the 3rd Anon, I was being serious about ignoring the world around me and you seem to have issues if you are so defensive
DeleteFirst anonymous again
Deleteah, your usual response that your commenters must have issues if they're providing you with feedback.
Of course I see people on the train not give up their seats to an obviously pregnant woman, I get walked into while someone else is texting, etc. these things might annoy me for a moment, but they don't make me hate the world or cause me to cry out of anger. Sometimes someone doesn't hold the door because they're preoccupied with something that is happening in their life and they didn't notice. It happens. Sometimes I've been the person to walk into someone while texting because I'm frazzled and running terribly late and trying to reach my friend while walking. It doesn't make me a terrible person, in the same way that these people you are so angry at are also probably not terrible people.
Empathy really helps with happiness
Says the commentor who always has something snarky to say?
DeleteLots happening here. I agree with the comment about CBT. It's helped me considerably deal with anxiety and stopping anxious thoughts before they spiral out of control. The world is full of people and things that will make you angry, whether they do it on purpose or inadvertently. But dealing with those emotions is your own responsibility.
ReplyDelete