Sunday, November 29, 2015


A followup to the other day's post.  I think I've talked about it before?  I go on dates to have a nice conversation, see if there's chemistry/a connection, determine if we want to see each other again, et al.  I don't go on dates just because he's buying dinner.  And if he's someone who thinks that, he's a waste of my time; he doesn't understand me and even worse, has a WIIFM mentality.

Friday, November 27, 2015


Ever hear of WIIFM?  Aka, "What's in it for me?"  I don't like this way of thinking, at all.  I dated one guy who used to bring it up when talking about business.  Towards the end of our courtship/relationship, he started bringing it up when it came to me.  For example, giving me a ride home after dinner.  He actually said, "You get a free dinner and a ride home.  What do I get?"  Me (to myself), "After that, me never seeing you again."

When I have dinner with a friend, I don't think that's even a thought that crosses his/her mind.  It certainly doesn't cross my mind.  If a friend buys me dinner and drives me home, it's because they like my company and they like me as a person.  Perhaps they want to make sure I get home safe, perhaps they know the dinner will be filled with laughter, et al.  So, when I find out a suitor is thinking WIIFM, I don't think he's interested in me enough (at least not as a person).

Thursday, November 26, 2015

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving!  Hope everyone is having a nice time with friends, family, and/or alone.  What are you thankful for this year?

My top three:
  1. I'm thankful that I don't work in corporate anymore
  2. I'm thankful that I'm very over New Leaf Guy and other guys who weren't right for me
  3. I'm thankful that I've been sleeping really well (I believe sleep is best way to stay healthy)

Monday, November 23, 2015

A Long Lost Girlfriend

The guy from the weekend.  The food was good, the conversation was good, the spark was no good (there was no spark...on either of our ends).  I felt like I was talking to a long lost girlfriend.

Saturday, November 21, 2015

Have Patience

Not everyone is glued to their phones, I'm certainly not.  I think many guys I interact with this find this to be a problem (based on the complaints I've gotten over the years).  Well, to me, that just says they aren't interested enough if they can't wait a few hours for a text.  Have patience.  Sure, sometimes it's more than a few hours.  For example, guy texts me at 9 pm, I see it at 12 am, decide not to reply at 12 am because it's 12 am, go to sleep, wake up, get ready for work, go to work, and don't remember he texted til 12 pm.

Thursday, November 19, 2015


Date with a different new guy this weekend, another online guy.  I like that he moved quickly.  He emailed me quickly, asked me out quickly, and set up a dinner quickly.  And no, he wasn't deterred by me taking days to respond to emails.  My online dating emails/alerts get sent to my non primary email account.

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

That Was Fast

I've gone from being open to see this guy again to saying, no, I will not see him again.  He seems needy.  He keeps asking me what I think of him and if I'm interested in him.  We've gone out twice.  That's not enough time for me to determine if I'm interested in him.  This constant questioning is a big red flag.  Again, we've gone out twice!

Sunday, November 15, 2015

Excited And Nervous?

I went out with the lunch date guy again because 1) I think he was excited, which caused him to text me a lot - some of these texts were funny, and 2) I think he was nervous, which caused him to talk non stop on our first date.  I wasn't wowed on this second date, but also won't disqualify him yet.

Friday, November 13, 2015

I'm Begging You

Smart Guy who I haven't spoken to in years asked me if I'm married yet via text.  He's also literally begging me to see him.  It was "Hey, are you married yet?  I'm begging you to see me.  Please have dinner with me."  No, I am not going.  Yes, he is very successful, well educated, smart, et al, but I don't like the way he made me feel.  Everything I accomplished in life was due to "luck and good looks."  And, I don't wish to argue with him on why my opinions are "right" or "wrong."

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

New Job

I started a new job.  It's not a corporate job.  The pay is terrible, the perks are great, and I'll meet many new people.  I had my heart set on bartender or receptionist (these are both low stress jobs compared to what I've dealt with for the last several years); it's neither of those.  Even on bad days, it wouldn't compare to the agony of dealing with some of my former coworkers.  I've had many sleepless nights from working in an office and writting countless 3am emails.

I haven't decided if I will say what my new job is yet.  I probably will, eventually.

Monday, November 9, 2015

No No

New Leaf Guy has been trying to get my attention on FB by posting pictures from restaurants we've been to, articles on topics we've discussed at length, et al.  I feel a little bad for him.  He could have gotten what he wanted (me continuing to date him) if he had just been more considerate.  When we were together, he did some passive aggressive "acting out" things (not all the time, of course).  This one comes to mind, chit chatting on the phone (when he was already late meeting me) and continuing the conversation for another 15 minutes in front of me because he knew I was already annoyed.  No no.

The "perfect on paper" spell has been broken for a while now.  Rose colored glasses have been tossed aside.  Even worse for him, when I used to see his posts, I'd feel a tinge of something (mainly annoyance) and now I feel nothing.

Saturday, November 7, 2015


I've touched upon this in previous posts...I'm laid off (along with 30 other people in my department).  Yes!  I don't want to be there anymore.  My severance package was amazing.  So, I'm going to try out different jobs.  I've already sent out applications, gone on interviews, and accepted offers.  If I hate them, I can find another job.  Worst case, go back to the corporate world.

Thursday, November 5, 2015

A Hot Second

And after hating disqualified guys for a hot second, I feel bad for them...especially when they keep trying to reach me.  It's like, if this was something you really wanted to pursue and were interested in, why did you wait until after you were disqualified to step it up?

Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Hate Him For A Hot Second

I always end up hating whoever it is I dated.  It doesn't last forever, just a hot second or two.  I don't think I actually hate them (or maybe I do).  It's more of me being angry with myself for turning a blind eye to things that I didn't like.

I've hated New Leaf Guy on several occasions.  I was probably angrier with myself more than I was with him.  I'd call him out, he'd improve short term, and then go back to doing whatever it was that I found to be offensive.

There were a couple of times where I was close to a murderous rampage because of how he treated me (fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me).  My limit was reached.  Sure, we had nice times, but those nice times are not worth it.  I find myself much calmer now that I've stopped talking to him.

Sunday, November 1, 2015

Daylight Savings

It's the end of Daylight Savings.  This time of year makes me really think about changes I'd like to make.  Most people want to be in a relationship around the holidays; I don't.  I like having quiet time not surrounded by combined families or 900 family members of a significant other.